Ross Rosenberg, M.Ed., LCPC, CADC

The inherently dysfunctional “codependency dance” requires two opposite but distinctly balanced partners: the pleaser/fixer (codependent) and the taker/controller (narcissist/addict). Codependents, who are giving, sacrificing, and consumed with the needs and desires of others, do not know how to emotionally disconnect or avoid romantic relationships with individuals who are narcissistic – individuals who are selfish, self-centered, controlling, and harmful to them. Codependents habitually find themselves on a “dance floor” attracted to partners who are a perfect counter-match to their uniquely passive, submissive and acquiescent dance style.

As natural followers in their relationship “dance,” codependents are passive and accommodating dance partners. Codependents find narcissistic dance partners deeply appealing as they are perpetually attracted to their charm, boldness, confidence and domineering personality. When codependents and narcissists pair up, the dancing experience sizzles with excitement – at least in the beginning. After many “songs,” the enthralling and thrilling dance…